Sunday, May 6, 2012

Frustration

Ok, people, I'm frustrated and I don't care who knows it!

I am stressed about this new diet we're doing around here - no egg, no peanut, no gluten. My baby has severe allergies to the first two and has a gluten intolerance. She has been gluten free for just over two weeks now and it's working wonders on her. I'm stressed because it's working. Secretly, I think I hoped that gluten wouldn't be the issue and I could go back to normal - to all the cooking I've known for the last 38 years. But those days are gone. And I frustrated.

What do I usually do when I'm frustrated? I bake.
What do I do when I'm upset or stressed? I bake.
What do I do when I'm happy about something? I bake.
What do I do to show my family and friends that I love them? I bake!

Now my mother did teach me not to brag but right now I don't care. I love to bake and I'm pretty darn good at it. If I bake something - even a new recipe - I know that it's going to come out good and tasty. It just always does.

I can't bake now, people!

Every gluten-free recipe calls for egg. This is because, without gluten, baked goods have nothing to give them structure. So if anything gluten-free recipes call for more eggs than regular baking. I have been able to use egg replacers in regular baking. But what now?

I realize this shouldn't be this big of a deal. In fact, my youngest isn't really that into cake and cookies, etc. But I AM! And if it's going to be in the house, it needs to be Katherine-friendly. This kid is no dummy. She sees that other people are eating different things. And she wants what they're having.

I think if we just had to worry about gluten or just worry about egg, it wouldn't be so stressful to me. I've been dealing with the egg allergy for seven months now and, though it's been difficult at times, it hasn't been impossible. The gluten issue doesn't seem impossible either - lots of products, cookbooks and websites out there now to help. But both together feels overwhelming to me right now.

I haven't cooked much since we started eating gluten-free. I'm scared to, quite honestly. I guess it's time to jump in and see what happens. But the outcomes are unknown to me right now....and that stresses me.

I'll feel better tomorrow.

Thanks for listening.

More positive posts to come.

1 comment:

Cassie said...

I completely understand the activities that relieve... well... everything. I so fear one of my kids developing a major allergy like this because I think it would be so hard to cook. And maybe not even hard, just scary, like you said. But you are so amazing and resourceful, and really put your heart into everything, especially for those girls. I'm sure you will get the hang of it! Love you, friend!